v0.6.4: try_lock in the periodic reorder-buffer flush task

Fourth same-night fix in the lock-contention investigation. reorder_flush
ticks every 10ms and was unconditionally blocking on the same lock
handle_incoming needs on every incoming Data packet, even though its
own work is almost always redundant under real load (handle_incoming's
inline drain already does it). Switched to try_lock -- skip the tick
when contended, worst case a truly idle straggler waits one extra
~10ms before its own staleness timeout flushes it.